Over!

This is last night's setting sun setting over the Ashley River upon whose river banks I reside. Yes! Nature is very captivating to say the least because one's emotions could get tangled up with their misunderstandings. Do we want the day to end; or, do we want to hold on to its familiar pathways blessing us in "sin?" Also, I do want to remind everyone that just around the corner there is an establishment called the "wild joker," a N. Charleston "titty bar" where the same sun is setting in its remembrance as well. But there you could get bathed in real "sin." All my remembrance is over Charlestown landing, the home of the first settlers in the neighborhood. All of these descendents are from pirates because Charleston is and has always been a place for the underworld to meet and prosper; that is to say, "if you got the money 'honey,' I got the time." But I am there too, only I do not know what I was thinking or even the fact that I did indeed think; it could be that I just reacted to the way things unfolded around me. To me my life is over as the day is over because I question my memory's epistemic value, how truthful are my thoughts. For example,  my memories could have shifted when I was emotionally traumatized by the state of S.C., dramatizing its effect.  For sure!  Depression and suicide became the parallel tracks that took me through prison, then into 5 years of mental health therapy, "fucking" torture. Yes! for 5 years I had to attend weekly group meetings for mental health sessions with Charleston County mental health division of  S.C. The idea was to indoctrinate me into admitting that I was a "rapist" when in fact there never was a "rape." Than they put a target on my back when S.C. listen me as a "rapist" living in Charleston at 22 Bennett st. Talk about negative reinforcement. Now we are all different but I simply could not hold back the fear any longer; therefore, to survive I lost all sense of self in the moment of surviving my daily toxic environment including my memories. So that on some occasions, I question the memory at hand because it seems to have come from a vicarious source such as a book or T.V. What is truth & what is fiction. Also, when you have gone through mental trauma it is not unusual for memories to be lost. So, you see sometimes a picture can be deceiving when you do not understand the composition of the picture; Yes! I the "voyeur" am taking the picture because it is my only evidence of the moment: this is what I know; this is what I saw. Here is the picture: The individual interacts with others in relation to their past relations with people, their experiences; if all of the reinforcement has been negative, where can the positive behavior come from? It must come from positive reinforcement: Please remember to imagine your thought's environment in relation to others so that you can bring about your ideas, to get your needs met. Really! Learning takes place when the brain understands the meaning behind the desired action to be taken to bring about the desired behavior.

Never! no.

I have no "idea." It's the Stockholm syndrome I suppose: please do not hold me responsible after you stomped this shit into my head. The accepted negative format coming back on itself, like a piranha from one of the South American streams chowing down on someone's ass. Yes! This is the truth because society is very cruel when it thinks that it has been crossed. The mob will form for anyone of the various causes that gets touted about on a daily bases. When I think about myself, the way in which prison's effect destroyed my past because I died in prison, meaning that the life form that entered prison is not the life form that came back out, brainless & without past memories, scrambled anyway. Now! Life is quicksand because their is no control when society feels it has been crossed. Yes! I believe that I must be falling in love with my captors since I claim that I am a "political" prisoner.  I am a felon in society's prison; it's "the icicle garden," where every day is a snow day. The U.S.S.R. had Siberia's gulags & the U.S. has its prison mentality of separating its population by class distinction, like felon on the bottom never to become touchable unless politically connected to the power elites. Than you can run for State office; "you know" like the Senate in S.C.  What can I say, in this world of ours -yours and mine- we have to accept those who stomp away on our "liberties" or we will be denied our "rights;" this is said to be done in the name of safety, homeland security. Picture the inner workings of Machiavelli's take on the Marquis de Sade's inner sense of balancing his pleasures as they bounce -out and about- on the happy environs of desire.  The "Prince" was all about inculcating the masses into control by dominating over their resources like de Sade tortured his victims for his own gratification -orgasm. Yes! "the times they are changing..." but the fucking power structure; its connection to the corrupt streams flowing from the churches' dogma on "redemption" is polluted so as to foster "polio" of the soul.

soup

When the "mouse" takes control of spell check, I cannot stand those red lines for they challenge me so I want my "fucking" mouse back.  I cannot spell my way out of yesterday's underpants if you catch my drift. OK! It started working again! What a relief to get rid of the red lines about spelling. It is just amazing how much I can get those 26 letters messed up, out of sequence. Life could be made simple if only: Imagine that you were in a circle of 26 people, each representing one of the letters in the alphabet, each with its unique sound so that you can mix & match letter -strings into word -strings to maximize the day's journal entry. The individual is as unique or subtle as is the sounds of the letters in one's alphabet; now the differences can be tricky when you, let's say translate English to french; yet, sound is not taken into consideration lending this to contribute to misunderstandings. Now! With my mouse, I have "right click" on the mouse and the word is corrected by a tape of the "finger"; use the index figure and have fun with yourself. I do not have "right click" on people so I am still getting them wrong, how about you? That is why I ask you to get into a circle of 26 people, see if you can discern their "right click." Meanwhile, since the circle is formed check out the different sounds coming from the unique differences that each in the circle are radiating out. It has been said by those who are much brighter than I am, as long as you are in the circle listening to the sounds of others in the circle, the greater your understanding of the character and timber of those in the circle. Yes! please imagine what kind of "memoir" you could write if you took the time to participate with those in your circle of friends, allowing for their differences as you explored the many difference within yourself.  I wish people had a "right click" like my Mouse does.      

Water "sports!"

Let me be: "let it be...." When everything is on the table, you are on the table too: Meaning, action is continuously in motion as your stomach's respiratory system is. Action is the tangential force nurturing the optimal outcome. For example, "fear" is the absence of action for action is fearless because it is action that makes the world go round, not fear and procrastination. Yes, it is true that there are consequences for each move being made moment to moment as life moves on. Let me tell you a "story": in the complex where I live the water bill is part of the regime's monthly costs. So, if the water is being wasted than it is my responsibility as a citizen of the corporation's alliance to speak up; I said to the little cigarette smoking oriental looking man who was spraying the plants from the opposite side of the driveway, flooding the drive between himself and the bushes, " water is 'very' expensive." Yes that was it; for he shut the water off, went home. Now, I do not know why he did not just walk across the drive, spraying the bushes and not wasting water.  So, what am I saying? The oriental looking man understood the consequences of his actions and acted appropriately. As for myself, I was hoping that the  man had some of his Divine DNA in his family's tree because he could take offense. By his actions, he did not question this funny looking old white man wearing a foolish hat on his head with a feather sticking out of it portraying an image, that he could be a beast of nature. You Know! I would not want to engage in a long conversation over his socialization if I did not have to, especially on my way to turn the water on at the pool, because the real temperature here in Charleston today will be 107, at this temperature water evaporates drearily. But the pool must stay at a steady level to run it properly for the use of the guests. I'm not a guest, I'm a victim of a foolishly constructed  homeowners contract. I do not use the pool so the water level means nothing to me; yet nature means everything to me. I would rather be watering the plants & bushes properly than what I was on my way to do, turning the water spigot on, allowing water into the pool so that the sun can suck it up. Yes! mother nature will also spit it right back at me in the form of one of S.C.'s stormy hurricanes. But when I get that "water" back it is not on my sewer bill; it is covered by my insurance's obligation. The "Beatles" strike again, "let it be....
 

Innocence Project

I want to form a union of felons because I'm a felon without "rights;" every felon in the state of S.C. has been persecuted because of who they were, felons. Felons are the new "slave class" in the U.S.  when you cannot go before the courts because of previous behavior that had been adjudicated and resolved yet reactivated when the laws change. For example, the sex offender registry did not exist when I was sentenced and it did not come into effect until after I was released from prison. Yet, because of political corruption and judicial collusion, I have been tethered to the cross because I will not confess to a crime that I did not commit. I herd story after story while I was in prison from inmates who said that they had confessed to their crime because the "rogue" prosecutors intimidated them into confessing guilt for a lighter sentence or go to trial and end up serving life in prison instead of the bargaining down with the judge who has sway over the prosecutor. For example. I went before the Real Estate Commission looking to get my Real estate license back; so that I could work for BlueGreen a real estate company marketing the "Lodge Alley Inn" in Charleston, S.C - Otherwise known as a "job." Jinny purchase a membership in the "lodge Alley Inn" so I could use it as a free family vacation raffle for Charleston County school district. Jinny wanted to connect to the community so that she was giving back. The winning family from the school district would get to use the right to trade through out the trading system, like Disney World in Florida or wherever. So, the idea was to use the Lodge Alley Inn as as place to meet others and have the privacy of a suite for private bathroom usage for the ladies at night.  The night that they fired me was the night set for Jinny's function and therefore we had to call all the guests up and tell them that it was canceled. They did this so that they could make the guest take a tour first. They did not care that it was a research project that Jinny was doing on the subject of "transportation" and schools for children, like the "Child & Family Development Center," at  the old Charleston Naval base. This was not a BlueGreen event. This event was paid for by Jinny and BlueGreen wanted to pirate the event.   That very night the guests were going to be asked to fill out the "transportation quest" we wanted a true reaction so the guest thought they were meeting with Jinny to explore the facilities that she was offering to those who come together for a good cause. But, the true "meaning" was to come at them with a clean slate: with the question on "transportation" their data was important because  they were to be the "control" for the study.  I took the matter up in small claims court; the "judge" SAID " it does not "matter" the only thing that mattered was that he was the "Master of History" and he personally knew all of my history; do you thing you can win in my court room?" This is what the judge said to me; he did not care that I needed a license to do the job, I could go to jail if I lied to a prospect because I am supposed to have a fiduciary relationship with them. No lies! He said that the real estate commission had no value to anything. I have no "rights." I cannot get due process in the state of S.C. So, it seemed to me that if "Nothing -a group of people" can become a corporation; than the corporation becomes a person, and therefore get the right's of a person. How about the inverse? OK! So, I  become a corporation and as a corporation, I can act like a corporation can act; I can litigate the terms of these restrictions being placed on my ability to get employment. I want to get corporate rights to get my human rights under the 13th amendment of the Constitution of the U.S. I think that their is a legal precedent because a corporation by its very nature of being incorporated becomes a citizen too, with all the rights of an individual; therefore, as an individual I also "should" be able to become a corporation and as such get the rights of a corporation to litigate over labor. Also, if I were a corporation I would welcome unionization, become a union member just like Constantine did when he became a Christian, 300 AD Rome.  As a member of the "union,"  I'm asking for the evidence about the Law, not the "statute" of prejudiced because the prosecutor screamed to the jury: "he is a 'time share salesman' what chance did she have." Now the prosecutor knew that she was tampering with the jury because I sold "family vacations" and that was my history. I was fired from most of the resorts on the beach because I would not lie to the family about their vacation possibilities, for example,  I would not sell it as an investment in real estate, as in renting it out and making money. If it is a right to work state why do you need a "license" which cost money to get and carries a liability with it?  Now today, you do not need a license to sell vacation programs because the "southern elites of S.C did not want to protect the consumer they want to fleece the consumer; that is why the S.C legislature removed the licensing requirement needed to sell these programs. But, when I was involved a license was required; therefore there was a tertiary contract between the state and license holder. I'm a political prisoner who needs a way to get relief because when I went up for a Pardon it was turned down for political reasons meaning that I did not have an honest opportunity for getting the pardon; this cost $15000 reduced to $12,500 if paid in cash for something that could not happen; the state of S.C put a "sting" on me. The state of SC allowed me to think that I could get a Pardon if I did every thing legally but in fact this was not politically possible; the state is a "fucking" fraud.      

"La La" land.

In today's world it is all about politics. Yes! This is the truth - it may not be your truth; but it is society's truth. It's the truth of "La La" Land. Now this is why I believe that if "felons" united by joining together -the act in itself is Kafkaesque- their assembly becomes the "stage" - upon which they have a "voice." If there is a "voice" than others can hear it. So if there is no "voice" how does one expect others to hear the "quiet" turmoil boiling away? Therefore WWW.theblackmarket.me is the place to be. It's the way of Kafka. "It will set one free of old assumptions, to discern previously unseen patterns, and to dare. Come touch, taste, tap, toy with, discover and rekindle that which is ours yet yours alone," the Humanities. There in the Humanities one can find the political way -once one is unionized. For example, let's say that one became a legal corporation, let's say I was a corporation, I could force arbitration; the felon would become the attorney's best friend all over again. What a fantasy it would be if the felon could sue the potential employer for refusing their opportunity of success based upon the grounds of being a felon. Think about it; if a corporation is a person & a person can become a corporation what restricts the felon from suing on grounds of discrimination, using the corporate view of arbitration, litigation. This is exactly what I'm in the process of doing, becoming a corporation's citizen. Then I'm going to take it wherever it will take me because wherever I go there will be a record of their actions as evidence of corruption due to political pressures. Bu if the truth be known, they tried to kill me once. I know this because I heard the story going around from one of the regulars who attended the "jail house" in Carrizozo, N.M. It could be that he just liked having a private cell - I slept in the bullpen & we shared a common area out side of the toilets; it was a setting out of the wild west. The dude was one of the local shamans. He told me that he saved my life only because I offered him help one cold and snowy night in the town of Ruidoso, N.M. He said that they were coming to get me if they could. Do not fool yourself into believing that there is justice. As per my very own experience, there is no law other than the law of "power" & money - the laws that govern the masses on behalf of the few, the elites. Imagine dubbing Kafka's cape and seeing how the masses are morphing into the "betel" of the day, hogtied.
         

Pieces!

OK! Let's get with the "program" - this is what she said to me because I was in the habit of using the word, "should." It would tear her a new asshole because in her mind it was being disrespectful for she preferred the word "could." She "could" do this or that or any other thing that she so desired; but by no way other than fucking hell was I or anyone one else going to tell her she "should" do anything. You Know! For me it had been a life time thing to say "should" if I thought it was consequential. One day she broke down and told me the story behind her anger: One day while out riding on the back of a motorcycle the guy pulled over on a dirt road and put her through the "should" program and she ended up giving him a blow job. This was now a "metaphor" that floated around the game of our love play; she would go from heaven to hell instantly upon hearing the bedeviled tone coming out of my mind's tongue, "Victoria you "should"...; before I had the chance to kick myself in the ass she was getting out her "strap-on;" through the process of "pegging" my ass, I was going to get a taste of her fucking revenge. So yes, I came to the conclusion that if there was ever going to be any kind of a compromise, I was going to have to become just another one of her disciples. Anyway, our relationship ended rather abruptly, when she came home from a hard day's work I presented her with my wonderful new experience of traveling through space. Yes! This is what I believe happened on that day of mediation. She would go to work; I would go into my man cave; light a candle placing it at the base of my mirror of reflection where I would relax the frames of my mind, thereby giving me back my spent yesterdays. She thought I was talking about astral projection; but no I told her that while I was out and about on my afternoon walk in the park that I stepped off of the curb and ended up by stepping onto the street up the block. Yes! she attributed it to me doing "drugs" and only hallucinating. I said, "No! it is all because of you; you are such a wonderful source of energy." Than we got into this argument about her "energy" -meaning when she leaves the house she leaves behind a most juicy energy; "it fires me up," I said. This is where I fucked up: I told her that I got along better with her "afterglow" of energy than I did with her when she was home. Anyway! She kicked me out of the house and told me to go back to the beach and hang out with the rest of the broken "pieces" of shells.