Open Apology

I want to take this time and apologize to ANYONE who received inappropriate material from my FB  feed; it was due to my inexperience with trying to build my website -theblackmarket.me. I did not realize that when I commented on or "liked" someone's Page because they asked me to that everything on their page would go out to everyone in my FB feed & for this I am very sorry. I will try to be a better steward to my FB friends in the future. Now! That said: I want to tell you as best I can, without offending any body, I use my FB friends as "therapy," a way to vent out "emotionally" instead of acting out against life's fiascoes in a "physically" disruptive fashion. Now, I have FB friends from around the world; each and every one of them is different; these differences seem to manifest in some very creative postings. These postings, as you know, appear on my FB page so that anyone who visits my personal page might find some of the content rather risque in its openness. For example, someone posted on their FB page a video of a young man dying from blood loss do to a bike accident. In the video you see a group of people filming his death. Each had their I-phone out at the ready to collect the evidence. Yet, not one soulless observer in the video rendered the dying boy help. Life is cheap! But, like the press reporter from days gone by, the "scoop" goes to the first observer who can post the "video" on their FB page, getting the byline. Yes! this is the extreme to some & normal to others; who are we to judge when we step over the homeless as we go "out & about" in our daily lives. I did not post this video, yet it appeared on my FB feed. It's FB's porthole into "Dante's inferno" as seen through the eyes of the Marque De Sade's memoir making fantasy.  e-mail  balanceincr@me.com
      

Remembrance: "..?.."

This is the "?" if you can follow my drift. You do not know me: no one knows me because no one knows themselves. You Know! If no one knows their "space"- identity as it is being displaced when they occupy various interactions with others. For example, looking at a group of known individuals, each will have a different standing -identity in the group- as they are being assimilated or accommodated by their peers, their degrees of fluid movement. "Degrees of fluid movement" - I never had "it;" I can not remember a "fluid movement." Because when I move from person to person I have no real idea of who I am. So, at any particular moment who gives a flying "fuck" anyway. I say this because everyone seem to be jockeying around for their "self best interest." Am I right or wrong? So maybe life is all about "gossip;" and living is peddling "gossip" in a cryptic fashion. It is sort of like the once popular t-shirt, "shit happens." OR! "A China-man's chance" was a one time expression which meant that you were more likely to "die" than succeed at what your most desired opportunities were. So, the question becomes -how do you deal with your understanding of the situation at hand. For example, the "American Dream" used to be like the Jefferson's on TV - "moving on up." But this is no longer true because it seems that people are more into trying to keep what they have. Fuck the false ideal of "moving on up."  People do not want their children or themselves to lose their position like "middle class" or "working class" and end up in the "No class" or "under class." You Know! "welfare class." Remembrance could or "should" be all about the French Revolution and every time the "elites" slide back to the T-shirt -if there is no bread let them eat cake- pull out the guillotine and chop of some heads. Side Bar: we all "should" be a feminist because a the rate our society is moving men will be home; the women will be in the work force; maybe they will bring back the unions; otherwise the "elites" will simply enslave the minds of society into believing that their just reward will come in the next world. You Know! Religion. e-mail balanceincr@me.com

Maintaining:)~(i)

It is all about the small " i," the insignificant "eye." This is when someone is in a situation & their sense of social intercourse is off on their level of engagement. This could be considered, like the "Peter Principle," a moment when one's lever of "compliance" has been breached because the "i" is slipping in the quicksands that form around the "shifting sands" sponsored by life's fiascoes.Yes! the small "i" doesn't manage, resolve or contain; it traverses the fiasco like the skier traverses the moguls coming down the slope of life, some days there is "powder," other days there is "ice." For example, someone could go out into the desert, find a large sand dune and ski off and never even get wet. For example, there is a character called "Don De Marco" talking to his doctor about being "Don Juan" from century's past, lady killer -Dream Merchant. All the "ladies" were loving him because they subscribed to his "dream." This is the small "i" living it out on a different stage. I say this because I had the same relationship with my doctor; but there were differences. My doctor could not believe that I was so stupid or so unlucky while I was reflecting about my "fiascoes" that he chose to conclude that I was delusional as "Don De Marco" when he believed that he was the "legendary lover." We had great sessions but he really believed that my "stories" where just that "stories " when, in fact, they were honest attempts toward recovery. Now it is true that I was seeing him because I was "court ordered." The S.C. court said that I needed five years of intensive indoctrination because I refused to recognize my behavior, guilt. Now for the rest of the "story": It was a "kangaroo court"  during the storm "Hugo" which slammed S.C. What I was accused of never happened; so how could I find it in my reflections? Therefore there is no "Redemption." The problem is that my doctor thought that the court testimony was truthful which it was not. His assignment was based on the "truth" of false testimony. e-mail balanceincr@me.com

...deciple...?

If it is my job to tickle the "hell" out of you, then please bend over and allow me to stick my tongue up your "ares" and wiggle it around until you get a good belly laugh. OK! Let us put this another way: Because I am a "child" of life,  I learn "vicariously" as I do the bidding. And that usually means that I have to pull someone's head right out of their ass -first. The point that I'm trying to make is simple & yes, complex. For example, there is an expression that goes something like this: "think outside of the box." So, here is the secret: become a "box" collector, fill those boxes with "shoes" & than sell them back to the "ladies" as fashion. It's the "experience" learned "piece by piece" from playing in those boxes that puts you on the path to enlightenment, or "whatever." I'm the "disciple" from hell because it is "hell" when you get there. It is the assumption of "truth," at someone's level of knowledge about the "box"; this is what a mathematician might look at and say "degrees of freedom" because when dealing with a complex situation there are variables between and within these variables. There is nothing more "naive" than an uneducated mind because it keeps its "box" for "athletic" shoes which everyone knows only leads one to competition & "one upsmenship," which has no baring on the "validity" of the "sale" -idea. Now is the "time" to give your "box" a tickle & see if you are getting a good belly laugh. e-mail balanceincr@me.com

Heathen...; Again & again!

Hear I sit because the state of S.C. has me in a "political" system which is eschewed in corruption. Yes! I am declaring my self a "political prisoner;" PP that's me.  The state is denying me my 13th & 14th constitutional rights under the Constitution of the U.S. of America. This is why I'm in the "union" business, the business of unionizing "felons."You Know! I am a non -citizen in the land of my birth -a man without a sanctuary. Yes! I am homeless living in a sea of "shame" brought about by the "corrupt crackers" who wield the Devil's will. So, now I carry the sign to devil stenciled on my shame -666. Heathen -666, this is their sense of a felon's value. You Know! I'm the "stick"-bitch that society likes to stick their pins into as they worship in their hollows of Voodoo. & they do it so well; yet I do think that it would excite me more if they wore just a taste of leather. Let's get real & go on the "down low" with their idea of Sodomy.  For example, Karl Menninger wrote in "man against himself" that a black man feels that it is his duty to make a white man his wife. This is the needle that S.C. uses to stick in its "stick"-bitch of a doll when it goes into the bowels of its soul & religious practices, like Voodoo. From one who has been there, there is one theme that runs through an inmate's mind when vacationing with the department of corrections & it is "what will I be tonight; will I be a "pitcher" or a"catcher." "C'est Sera Sera" the future is not mine to see, what will be will be. But the end game will be the same, the state of S.C. will stick the black man's "prick" into the white "cracker's" hole and the marriage will be consummated,  
 

"...incoming...." prejudice!

Yes! These "boys" run with the dogs; so if you lay down with the animals on some level you too become an animal, or you find society's common denominator & howl out the excuses for why you are different from those who lay down with the animals. Because! You too are "breeding" with a beast -one of the "boys."  For example, there is a situation where an individual -one of the "boys" is praised for his "anger" when he is on the ball field - gladiator ready because it has been inculcated into him, response cost. If he is programmed to respond, action is first predicated upon the learned responses, learned behaviors from his environment, family of origin, the "shit on a shingle's."  These behaviors trump all others when under the influence of extraneous variables, like "alcohol" or "anxiety" over social intercourse. Please, if you take the individual -one of the "boys" out of his environment, he still will first react as if he is there anyway. And! Then the howling out of excuses by society that this behavior is a one sided highway; the parties of the situation are not equally culpable. Give me a "fucking" break; it is a he/she stage. You provoke its effect; it is your affect; therefore it's your responsibility. OK there is a guy named Rice; "Morning Joe" is persecuting his "behavior" as if he understood the behavior. Society is acting as if it never expected this "behavior" even though it has a great history of repeating itself across all sectors of society; yet "prevalent" in the most challenged segments of  society's citizens - one of the "boys."Now!  Please tell me ,"Joe," This is Rome all over again only every citizen is acting their part in real time, 2014 not AD/BC give or take a day or two on the side of the calendar of measurement. Yes! "Joe" life is a business; it is not some social gathering that you choose to attend. Or you choose not to attend, going against it out of spite, even though there are grave consequences. So imagine if you lived in an environment where the occupants bitched about their inability to rise above their labor that consumed each member of the family; each "bitched" their spin of their daily "shit on a shingle" special.  If the behavior you seek has to come out of this kind of a "household," where do you think it could come from if it was digested in the daily "shit on a shingle" special? That is right! Where the "fuck" will the roots of your social "desires" come from if its socialization is not there in the "shit on a shingle" special of the day. 

"working"...Split

It's all about the money: if you have the "money," honey, I have the time. Somebody has the time when someone else has the money. Money! Money! who's got the "time?" So what is the purpose of life if "money & time" are the pathways to "Joy?" I personally do not have this mind set: Because to me there seems to be some way to combine "work & calling" - something that comes from within after it has had a time to percolate from the conundrum of the "soul." So the "cause" is personal growth. So let your calling be your personal growth through a confluence with others. Yes! How about being apart of the "fabric" of that which is naturally coming out of you. You & I are the cause behind life because we are living when we are involved with others. When we are self absorbed in the mission over "objects" instead of purpose we lose the natural relations of community that is needed to sustain us in the fabric of society. For example, most of us are not test tube babies, we were formed inside of the body of a woman, mother. Now maybe you did not have a good relationship with your mother; but it's the metaphor that I'm using because you come out of the womb;  Motherhood is a different "kettle of fish" which is larger than you. It is like social justice over the rebirth of purpose of containment in Prison. For example, consider abortion! Instead of coming into life with a "spirit," I might have been formed in the test tube, or like a petri dish sample being formed in the laboratory. And there would be no -soul of spirit - just another avatar taking their place in a Fascist form of socialization. Prison does not allow for the -soul of spirit, it neuters creativity into propaganda, turning the individual into a "garbage disposal" that consumes for the sake of consumption and the local land fill. Also, the prison could have been planted when you were forming; therefore, there would be no desires for actualization, only conformity of behavior with a prospect of redemption in the after life, recycling.